I’ve recently been given this unwritten responsibility of solving all the computer problems within my family circles. COMPUTER problems, can you believe it?? Sounds like there’s nothing wrong with the users!
Maybe they’re telling the truth. Guess it’s no big deal if your PC just tells you, “I downloaded some eh… crazy stuff from that big… Internet and now I… I’m kind of sick… must be a virus of some sort… cough… just fix it, would you?” Yeah, I’ve heard that even people go to strange places unprepared and bring back all kinds of diseases with them, so why not? I’ll see what I can do.
So, the patient wakes up in the morning just like any other day. He takes his time, maybe gets a cup of coffee with his newspaper, goes to the bathroom, brushes his teeth and all. But then he stops! For two minutes he just stares out of the Window, unresponsive to anything.
Then he starts hallucinating! Big and scary things popping up everywhere, strange voices mumbling: “There are ISSUES… issues… issues… you are unprotected… buy me…” all declaring in the end: “not responding… not responding… force close…”
After a brief slap in the face the patient is seemingly feeling a bit better. Then he starts telling his story. “They said it would speed me up! Oh, I was so reckless. I shouldn’t have believed them!” Okay, just tell me exactly what they gave you, and we’ll get you fixed in no time. “Well, there’s more to it… I kind of… don’t know, really.”
Patient agreed to go through a full tomography. Fourteen diseases were found and later on treated as appropriate. He is recovering well. Append into patient’s medical record:
Patient put on retirement and replaced with Linux. Problem solved the EASY way!